Rather than by Default, Live Life Deliberately

When I was a senior in high school it was expected for me to go to college and get a degree. It wasn’t that I had to go to an Ivy League school it was just expected that that is what was in store for me. Go to college, get a degree in something and get a job. That’s what you did in the late 80s. There wasn’t even really any talk about what my passion was and what I wanted to “be” when I grew up.

So I applied to 2 colleges that were a couple hours away and got into both. I literally chose the college I attended based on the name of the city.


It sounded so fancy. No joke that’s why I chose the school!

So I graduated from high school. Got my student loans and left home. Stayed in a dorm in a commuter school and CHECKED OFF THE BOXES. Remember the requirements to graduate ??‍?. It was a checklist!

So for 5 years (yes it took me a year longer than most even going full time) I checked off boxes and finished with a degree.

Much to my surprise – I entered the workforce with a “J.O.B” – one that needed a degree on paper, but in reality did not need any special degree. Once again just went through the motions and collected a paycheck.

In my late teens and early 20s I literally lived my life by default. CHECKLISTS – and lots of I guess I’m supposed to do that moments.

Then I started to wake up, I started to think about what I would LIKE TO DO. WHAT SOUNDS FUN??

It was time for me to live deliberately!

This was before I was introduced to the Law of Attraction and living life with purpose.

According to Abraham Hicks – In order to live a life deliberately you need to begin to tell a DIFFERENT STORY of your life. You have to tell a story as you now want it to be and STOP ? telling the tales of how it HAS BEEN or how it IS.

Tell the story you want to Experience!

To live deliberately, you have to think deliberately!

In your words, actions and and thoughts you must tell your story of how you want it to be. You have to FEEL GOOD while you tell it.

You have a split second to focus on the lack of what is missing OR choose to focus on what you WANT!

Here are some examples of what is or what is lack of vs what you want:

Health/Illness (absense of of health)
Happiness (absense of happiness)
Energetic/Tired (absense of energy)

I want to buy that vs I can’t afford that
I want to feel good vs I don’t feel good

I want to love my job vs I hate my job

We have a tendency to just tell it like it is. What is going on in our lives today.

But what if you changed the way you said things?

What if you told yourself

What You Wanted

How do we do this? How do we change our ways?

1. listen to what you tell yourself thoughout the day. Catch yourself in the middle of a statement that is contrary to what you want.
2. Tell yourself “clearly I know what I don’t want, but what is it that I want?”

I am fat
I want to fit into my jeans

My boss doesn’t appreciate me
I want to be appreciated

I can tell you I started practicing this naturally but yes of course as time goes by we tend to fall into our old ways. We tend to sabotage ourselves with negative talk.

Our days become consumed with what is lacking vs what we want in abundance.

Do you find yourself caught in this dilemma?