Why I opened a Facebook group called IdentityMe

Anna Gray, RN

31 October 2017

My Journey to setting up an amazing Facebook Group

In August of 2017 I opened a Facebook Group named IdentityMe after going through the hardest self discovery year of my life.

You wake up one day and you are married for 19 years, have two daughters who are early teens and tweens, you have the house on the hill, the cars, the money in the bank and the one thing you discover you are lacking, your own Identity

What do I mean my Identity?

I mean that I clearly forgot the things I love.  I forgot the bands that I love to listen to, I forgot there were travel destinations on MY OWN bucket list.

I discovered I had morphed so much into a mom and a wife, I forgot about me. 

When I shared these things on my Facebook Page I discovered I was not alone.  I knew I needed to gather more women who were going through what I was going through and spend time with them, rediscovering ourselves.

This was the first group out of probably a hundred groups I have created that I was not going to be the teacher.  I was simply just one of the group.  I would be one going through the same things the rest of the group would be.

I knew I needed this group but since it wasn’t going to be just my group I reached out to my friends on my Instagram page to even help me name the group.  I wanted the group to define the group.  And IdentityME was born.

What I discovered as running this group for a few months now is that the quality of the group over the quantity is what has given this group legs.  The conversations and consistency of the women in this group, give me joy.  Everyday I wake up and see a post from someone in the club having an AH HA moment for themselves.  They are in a safe place to share it and are encouraged and given virtual big hugs and high fives.

What this group is not

A complaining fest.  You would think that because we have lost our identity, we would be in a constant state of bitterness and complaints.  It is clearly the opposite.  People are in there to inspire themselves, to pick themselves up.  This is not a rule in the group but it is clearly just the vibe. 

What kind of things do we share in the group?

When I started the group I actually sat down and envisioned what the group would look like and feel like but had no idea what type of content I would share.  But I knew the FEELINGS that I wanted for the group.

Once I had that, I knew that I did not want to create your typical Monday Motivation, Transformation Tuesday Posts.  This group was going to be different.

This group would house content of what I and the group were going through in my life, I made it my so much my mission to listen to what people were saying and create posts around this.

In the beginning it was just posts to allow people even the shy ones to step up and have fun.

I created many polls to hear what the group members were struggling with.  One of those things that members talked a lot about was the inability to journal but they knew the value in it.

I tried to run one Journal Challenge that totally flopped.  In hindsight it was confusing.  But I knew the need was still there.  So I decided it would be only 3 days in the middle of the week and it was not going to take them more than 10 minutes.  I created 3 topics to write on and I posted in the group.

THIS WAS A BULLSEYE HIT!!

So, do we talk about journaling all the time?  NOPE.  Do people want to join the group because they have seen my posts on my Bullet Book Junkie Instagram page?  YES.  But what I have found is that the same people that see the value in journaling are the same people who want to better their lives. (a post about Bullet Journaling)

Listening to my ladies brings me joy.  Making them smile brings me joy.  Sharing my own struggles makes me feel supported as if I was in someone elses group.

This group is my pride and joy and I can only hope that it grows the right way with the right people.  As I plan on nurturing it more and more everyday.

If you are looking at connecting with other like minded women, and are on the path of your own self-discovery then join the club.  We would love to have you!